- on a math test: 2+2
- me: use calculator just in case
dang girl are you my appendix because I don’t understand how you work but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out
That is quite possibly the weirdest and most carefully thought out pickup line I’ve ever read. I applaud you.
There is now a measles outbreak in New York. A whole ward of cancer patients currently undergoing chemotherapy have been exposed to it. Imagine fighting cancer for years only to die because some jackass didn’t vaccinate their brat and you caught measles.
Fucking vaccinate your damn kids.
WHAT SOME OF YOU DON’T KNOW
is that their are these fancy fruits called “Blood oranges”
It is called blood orange because the outside is all orangey, while the inside looks like flesh.
(no that is not a grapefruit)
While it is in the orange group, it’s not like other oranges.
According to sunkist.com ”All oranges contain carotene — that’s what makes them orange. Moros(blood oranges) get their red color from high concentrations of a pigment called anthocyanin, a powerful antioxidant that neutralizes the effects of free radicals. ”
So next time you see someone say something is blood orange, they are probably referring to the distinct tasting, red fleshy color inside a Moro,
I saw it coming about 17 miles away and still laughed so hard i choked on my fucking spit
Oh my God. I finally understand why Circular Gallifreyan looks the way it does
They’re time lords. They are literally writing with time.
MAYBE THEIR NAMES ARE THEIR OWN LIFES, THEIR TIMELINES, AND THIS IS WHY THE DOCTOR’S NAME IS SO DANGEROUS
To the end of his days Bilbo could never remember how he found himself outside, without a hat, a walking stick or any money, and running as fast as his furry feet could carry him down the lane, past the great Mill, across The Water, and then on for a mile or more.